The King of Hearts

Back in my corporate days, I sold orthopedic implants to orthopedic surgeons. I sold hip joints, knee joints, plates and screws to put the bones back together after trauma or disease. The company back then was Zimmer (NYSE ZBH) and we were part of the pharmaceutical giant Bristol Myers Squibb (NYSE BMY). Zimmer had a 4 day National Sales Meeting in Las Vegas. There were about a thousand of us in attendance. After one particularly long session, Zimmer had hired a magician to lighten the load after several long sessions of product innovations, clinical updates and surgical technique tips. I was delighted for the break because I took pages upon pages of notes to capture all the new stuff and my fingers were getting tired.

The Magician did a very convincing card trick that was broadcast out to the audience from two large screens on either side of the stage that was trimmed in footlights and live plants. At the end of his trick, the magician tossed the deck of cards out to the audience, and since I was sitting in the front row a card landed, face down, at my feet. I turned the card over. It was the King of Hearts! I took the card, and I taped it into my paper day timer. Yep, back in the old days, we used paper pocket calendars that fit neatly in our suit coat or sport jacket. Today, the King of Hearts graces a wall in my office, and you will certainly see it when we do a Zoom call. The King of Hearts serves as a reminder to me and should serve as a reminder to you to be the King of Hearts! Or if you will pardon me, the Queen of Hearts. What do I mean when I say that you want to be the King or the Queen of Hearts? I mean- my success in this world, your success in your world is determined by your ability to get along with people.

It doesn’t matter if you are a doctor, a lawyer or professor, a school bus driver, an airline pilot or a politician, your success is determined by your ability to get along with people. And how do you get along with people? I’m glad that you asked. To get along with people you must find a way to capture their hearts. As the old adage goes, if you capture a person’s heart their mind will follow. That’s why we say that you want to win hearts and minds. You don’t hear people say we want to win minds and hearts. Another adage in the consultative sales world is People don’t care how much you know (the mind) until they know how much you care (the heart).

When I was 17 years old growing up in the Detroit area, my Mom handed me the book How to Win Friends and Influence people by Dale Carnegie. I read it in a few days between jobs as a high school kid working as a golf caddie at the country club during the day and bussing tables at the little Italian Restaurant at night. The book amazed me.

Everything that my parents had taught me up until then I was reading in this book. I was astonished. Just the title alone was enough to draw me in! How to WIN Friends and Influence People. You win friends through the heart. You collect hearts! You become the King or Queen of Hearts. And how do you do that? Well, you’ve got to read the book! But get this, once you win the heart of the person and made them your friend, now you have influence with the person whose heart you just won! Now you have influence with that person. Now you can lead that person. As one of my mentors, John C. Maxwell, says “Leadership is influence, nothing more nothing less”!

If you are a leader in business, in a non-profit, in a place of worship, or in your community, then you must become a King or a Queen of Hearts. If you want to engage your team in your mission, if you want to retain top talent, you must become the King or the Queen of Hearts. You as the leader must be the one to reach out, sit down, get face-to-face and begin to connect heart-to-heart with the members of your team or your organization. It will take time. It will take energy. It will require courage. But in the end, you will find that the magic happens in your business when you become the King or the Queen of Hearts.

Kalajian’s Korner

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